Plain day

So what did I do tday? Hmm.....IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII went to Jb alone!!! hahaha. Lame! Well, it was ok, i was listening to my ipod the whole time, I felt alone, cos i was alone, but last time when I go out alone, I dnt feel tt alone. Hmm, y eh?

But everything was ok, looked at things, cut my hair, got a head n back massage, so kind of them. REGULAR? ahaahaha. Anyway ya, then went over to city sq and bot sum1 a pair of shoe! Smthing to suprise her, so Im gonna write a note before she even opens the shoe box. Cos she only siad get her smthing to match her white and blue berms. So ya. Then went around, buy game, dvd and snacks. Thought I cld meet her and share the food with her, but i ended up meeting kai to chill cos i didnt know what to do since it was like super early and that she finished her skool late. Yea!

Hmm.......tomorrow is Sarah's school party and some presentation. She wants me there, and i wanna be there so i can take a look at all their interesting work. But its not yet a confirm. So yeah, I don't know yet. Hmm.......Is my mum working the next day? I hope she does.....

Shit! I forgot to keep the food in the fridge....

K Back!

Hmm.......well, the days and things tt i wanna do now are like so unplanned. I feel like my life's a mess, not abt sarah, but i just feel like its a mess. Thrs so many things i wanna do, finish up but like its so hard, why eh? Im like missing so many things that i love doing, expeditions, gg for backpacking trips, doing random stuff, working out but having fun! Kao, i wanna do all tt again, but i dnt know whats stopping me!

Urghhh!!!! Shit head!

Pissed out but ok!

Longing For

Yea yuh know
Only you Only you
Only you can make me feel, just like a king
Love you give to me so real
Makes me give in

Girl, just like magnet to steel
Your love -- keeps pulling me in,
If its a battle I'll fight for you,I have to win
To prove to you my love. is so deep within
Its even getting deeper
Since I reach prison

Longing for
My baby to love me more
What am I longing for?
Babylon release the Cure
What am I longing for?
My baby to love me more
What am I longing for?
Babylon release the Cure

When when when when?
Can we see each other again
When when when when?
Can we see each other again
I know there's someone, must be there comforting you
Whenever you need a friend
I'll make you mine, give me some time,
I'll surely make you mine
It may be long, now forever.
I vow, to get myself together
I love you baby, always on my mind,
No matter the time.

What am I longing for?
My baby to love me more
What am I longing ..longing..longing...
What am I longing for?
Babylon release the Cure

Only you can make me feel, just like a king
Love you give to me so real
Makes me give in

Girl, just like magnet to steel
Your love -- keeps pulling me in,
If its a battle I'll fight for you,I have to win
To prove to you my love. is so deep within
Its even getting deeper
Ever since..

What am I longing for
My baby to love me more
What am I longing for?
Babylon release the Cure

Im feeling better now. What a rough week that was. Hmm......I havent been doing a single thing this mnth. NOt even work. Shit sia........ Fucking Camps. And no job. Hmm......Things that are undone also havent get it done. Stoooopid me! Why the fuck am i wasting time? No Im not, its just that the time that i have are not reasonable. Its not some excuse i made up for myself, but ya, im not free at nite watt??? Im only free during the day and smtimes in the afternoon.

Hey sarah, Im sorry if I was bugging you with questions. Like i said i want my ans and assurance and i think i got it, I dont wanna be pissing you off with this questions cos ure still messed up and filled with so many things in your head and ure still unsure of sm things. Sorry...

Tday was awsm for me.....stayed home, bought some stuff at the market, and cooked shephard's pie with sarah. Yeah, We were hungry and it was yummy. Slept for awhile then went out to chill which was super short. Haha......

Well......she's gonna be busy tday, some stupid skool stuff, Fucking teacher. Yea, I hate her teacher, She's dumb and unreasonable. Anyway, the frens are gg clubbing tday, sarah's gonna be at skool, and Im gonna go jb on my own and do sm random stuff.

Hmm....when's next camp? Fuck far away but nxt mnth busy gileer uh. Have to save up again....

I really need to get the unfinished stuff done. Its bugging me and the loved ones are gg after me.....No more paying bills for me, told dad im running low. BUt yea, have been surviving quite well with money la, Fags and gg out mkoney and prepaid.

Well....Still breathing.

Can't wait for Friday.

Weeeee!!!!!

SeE yoU sooN.

Goodnight and Go.

=)

Happy Bday Dad

Happy Bday to my dad! The best guy tt ive met and the best person tt ive had in my life. Was never really close to dad till now. Getting closer to him as i grow older, as we grow older. Smtimes i wish i didnt disappoint him like i did.

Like no matter how bad and fucked up i am, he still has this energy to advice me, to love me and take care of me. And Im happy tt he is my dad. Im proud tt i have him. Ive made so many mistakes in my 19 yrs of life, and i wonder how he can tolerate me. I use to hate him, cos i can nvr talk to me. Like everytime i look at his face thrs this scary feeling, and finally, i don't have tt feeling anymore.

I can talk to him like my fren, and i jus feel free talking to him about my probs.

His getting older, and soon he'll get tired, I just hope nothing will change for now.

Well, best wishes for him, may he have a long healthy life so tt he can be here for me and the family. Can nvr imagine if his gone.
Love you dad!

I try my best to make every single moment of our lives special and fun. Did it work? Did it happen? Or did i jus fail?

We are somewhr out thr loving each other alot, but yet we can't be together. I understand the reasons. Am i selfish? The questions all still play around in my head. Isn't it nice to be in love? Isn't it nice to love and be loved by somebody. To be cared and missed.

Im missing all of that now. I don't know why. The time's gonna come. Time will tell the ans. But why? Arn't we happy? Arn't you happy? It saddens me, but I am happy. It saddens me cos i noe what's waiting infront of me, but I'm not sure how to react.

Am i not good? Am i never good enough? Am i pathetic? I m not, My hearts telling me what to do. Hmm.....

Hmm......Siti Sarah......why? Love? Misses? Kisses? Hugs? Comfort? Friendship? And love?

I just can't get you out of my head. And Im jus so close to you, Im comfortable with you. I can't stop calling you mine. Is tt wrong?

Do you remember, us lying down. Asking ourselves, or maybe telling each other under the stars, I feel like i Love you, but do you think its love? Then we lied thr silent. But we jus smiled and didnt say anything cos we know. We know it inside of us. Tt we like each other very much and that only time will tell that we love each other. And up to this day......my feelings have develop. It loves you, I love you.

Im feeling uneasy but my heart wants it all out. It can't keep it in. Not being able to meet you or see you on certain days.....my god....it feels too long. I can't wait. May tomorrow be a good day for us.

May the ans come. Heart you

Sometimes I wonder, Sometimes I think. I ask, why are we so special? And there's so many reasons why we are so special.

You are amazing. You are random. And you are my angel and you have swept me of my feet. Sometimes I do think that maybe sometimes we should have been friends, but Whether we are firends or not, My heart will still skip beats for you. Ask me again, why? Im clueless. Ask yourself why you love me, bet you're clueless too.

But no matter how far you are away from me, no matter how busy we both are, I nvr fail to think of you, I never fail to continue loving you. Cos my days starts with you. You are in me tt gives me the strength and faith, you give me my cheerful mornings. Especially when Im away, far from you. But yet, my heart still beats fast for you no matter where we are. Im always waiting for the day to end or the week to end so i could meet you fast. And by this time i think we've grown and we still are. We have grown. Ive seen us grow and develop. We are getting stronger each time. It is a test for us. But no matter wat comes in my way or our way, i always smile after that cos i know we can go through it, together.

I just want you to be happy. I want us to be happy. Ure the greatest buddy, a wonderful Lover and ure jus an amazing human. Smtimes I run short of words to describe you, tts why this heart of mine Loves you alot.

Im happy for us, Ive never been so happy. I am in love again. Im in love with an angel. We'll see how far we can go. I trusts you. Which makes it a challenge for me. I wish we could just stay the way we were, being happy. Smiling everyday.

Ubin, Thailand, the random days. Walking to anywhere without a motive of anything but we still have fun.

Be strong ayul. Be strong.

Just don't hurt me.....don't hurt me. Please.........This heart of mine is small, but the love for you is alot. I love you Siti Sarah.

And So NOFX was Superb. It was awesome but it wasn't how i expected it to be. It wasn't so packed but still it was awesome. Yesterday was 1 of the best days ever but also the suckiest.

I fought with my deary and yea it was a big fight. I havent cried my heart out for such a long time. And when she told me we're gonna break up, my heart sank so deep i cldnt breath. I was thinking to myself.......will my heart be broken again? Will my heart be scared again. I don't wanna go through this again.

How could you do this to me? I ask myself sometimes, why when we fight, you must ask for a break up? You know how sad I'l get? Its like you don't want this relationship. Its like you don't want us to stay. Cos everytime a big fight happens, you ask me to be your friend. Ive told you before, if we ever do break up, Il never be you r friend neither your enemy. We'd be like not knowing each other. Cos you are my best freind, my good buddy and my lovable girlfriend, and if we do breakup, its never gonna be the same again.

I jus wish you cld change tt habit of yours. You say you love me, then why let me go? Why don't you wanna keep us together? Im Sad Siti Sarah. Im Happy when You're around me. Your presents just make me happy......im filled with joy when you're beside me. You mean alot to me.....You are that special to me. I wonder whether Im special to you. Cos sometimes Im cluless. I wanna noe how much you love me, how far would you go for me.

Being together is easy, but holding us together isn't as easy. Its like maintaining a car after you buy it. Its not tt i wanna compare but yea. And i wanna noe whether you are willing too to go for the long run

I guess you wnt be reading this cause you rarely blog now and i guess you don't even check my blog anymore. As this blog slips away....

I love you dear Sarah.

Pls don't bring me down.

Don't break my heart.

May the both of us stay happy together.

Missing you like coconuts.

Love you DUDU!

Here comes April. NOFX IS COMING TO TOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOO!!!!! And I'm watching them!!!!!! AT last the lengends are here in singapore and I spent 60 bucks to watch them. Its this friday! Shit!!!!! What should i wear? What should i wear? Fuck la! Its a punkrock show, why the hell am i thinking of what to wear??? Hahahaha!

Hmm.....everythings going on fine....camps dnt call me that often so i really am freelancing all over the place. This month not much money. :( But its ok....nxt mnth working with AO and ill try to hit the jack pot.

Hoping to go for another awesome holiday, hopefully with Sarah. It's her Holidays soon so HELL YEA I want to go for a holiday....Hmmm.....whr I'm not so sure yet.

St James looks like its almost done for me cos I havent worked with them for quite sm time. I dnt noe why dnt ask me, maybe out of lazyness? Maybe......But Balaclava offered me a job and they pay mpre, but again.....its Night life. Sm times Yea I am tired of working Night life but their work Timings are great! Hmm....Let me think about it 1st.

Gotta go! Chow Romanos.....I HAVE CAMP! I NEED TO WAKE UP AT 5!