Woah!

Three sleepless nights

This isn't how its supposed to be.

But you are so good at taking your time to get back to me.

I will wait for you forever,

if you would just ask me.

I thought that I could change you

but you changed me.

It doesn't feel right,

holding someone else's hand.

Together on phone line,

and living at two opposite ends.

It scares me to think,

that you could find takers other than me

and better than me.

But your head is elsewhere,

and I’m talking enough for both of us.

When will you see it's not so easy for me

you’re careless, and whispered, insulting, and bruising.

And I thought that you said things were improving.

These laces are untied,but my feet are still walking away.

I fall from you eyes, your eyes I trusted,

you said forever.

I never thought that you could say these words.

Is this really happening?

Erase my name from this page.

How can you take all these days,

What is inside of me what have I done and throw them away.

Is this the only way that you will notice me as I sit here waiting for you

Dead words for closed ears all this is sung for you I stay up nights

If you are still pretending this is what's right until stars leave the sky

Why can't you look at me can you only see?

knowing what my dreams can take away

One side, your side, can take away

Walk away from me. This night is done.

So its another day of skool b4 i start my holiday. 1 more test and i'm done and i'm gonna really suck at it. Actually, i sucked at all my test. Tts shit man. So ive already planned my schedule for next mnth and its all filled up with work and camps. 3 weeks of holiday so its gonna be 3 weeks of work not forgetting working every weekend. Can't wait to really start work again. I'm jus bored la tts why, and ya saving up big time. So zad, i only have 1 day off every week k. Don't worry i'll give you a call when im on off k. Cos im not so sure yet wat days i have off k. Hmm...k im bored, think i'll go to Jb after i finish this up. O and wat makes this holiday sucky, i have 2 projects to do and one of the projects jus had to be on HTML, which i hope someone can help me out. Date of submission, 2nd August. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Same shit

This is how it’s been, this is how it will be
and when you wake up with him, remember when it was me
and I always will be waiting for you
and I know that you will never see...that

Do you remember when, you used to laugh there with me
and now I’ve become the joke, a punchline’s all I will be
and I always will be waiting for you
and I know that you will never see ...that

You’ll be waiting for the rest of your life
just so you can finally miss him
These words don’t mean a thing but I’ll say them anyway
...anyway, yeah

I can’t break away from these chains to my heart
the further you push me the closer you are
maybe I should try to let go
maybe I should try to walk away
there’s nothing left to say...but

Cause i can't break away

Same old shit in skool, having my lame 3 hrs break. Not knowing wat to do. This is lame. After skool i got work. So ill try not to tire myself. ! more day of skool and work b4 going to Ubin. Gerek.....Really can't wait.

Next week, last week of skool and then its my hols for 3 weeks long. Thrs when im gonna find my money. Work my part-time job and do camps. Tts for the next 3 weeks tts coming up.

And so it is.....

LIfe's been dull. Going out almost every day doing nothing, just random hanging out. Well....but for this weeek, I'll be busy, freaking busy. I'll be working every single day after skool hours all the way till friday. Thank god its just for this week. Then sat and sun i'll be having some peace time to myself with some frens. Hmmm....can't wait. Now my only concern is my supplies. Don't have time to get them, and hmmm.....do i have money? shit.....

Anyway....wats up with skool? Things are better nowadays but skool still sucks big time. I'm still thinking how i'm gonna survive this 2 years of shit. I have 1 test this week and another next week. Just hope i can understand by just reading shit. My holiday is nearing and i can't wait. It's 3 weeks long and I'm so gonna fucking work for fucking money so i can live life. Life seriously sucks without money. It wasn't like this last time. That was once upon a time uh.....can always survive with 2 bucks in my pocket. Now.....now its totally different. So ya...holidays, work...have fun...make alot of money.

The memories

Wasting time

I have nothing to do at skool so im on the net almost everyday and blogging everyday cos I'm bored. Hai...this ends next Tuesday. The teache in charge is on leave. So yeah, going to skool doin nothing but wasting money, effort and time. Hmmm.....smtimes i wish i was a rich boy living this kind of life. Can demand anything i want and i'll be owning every new gadget available. Confirm fun nya eh?

So now i'm just studying on my own, trying to understand eventhough i can't. Sm great ppl in class are teaching me the HTML shit. And, i'm trying my best to understand it. So yeah.

I can't wait for the upcoming Ubin trip. Can ease my mind, can relief stress and can have fun! I think I'll never get board of the place sia. Cos everytime i go there, it really, really helps sia. Money.....hmmm.....pocket money ok....just nice, but in terms of settling or trying to finish up wat i left of with quite irritating cos i haven't start work. Waiting for 2 pay checks so once i start work.....Hopefully everything will go smoothly.

Its just complicated!

Haizzzzz.......I try not to think about it but it really, really does annoy me or should i say irritate me. I'm trying to calm myself down and i thought when school starts, things could cool down abit. But i thought wrong. Hmmmm....my parents has been trying to calm me too, everyone around me has tried calming me down but every time i try to calm down and not think of some things it starts all over again. I start to get angry and feel sad and i get stressed myself.

My parents have been doing a good job advising me take things slow but......how the fuck can i take things slow if everything is rushing up to me? The teachers are still doing nothing about it and I'm just so angry about that fact. They want to take in students but they never think how the students are going to make their way through. No wonder alot of students kill themselves. Its like what tau.......you donno 1+1, the teacher is already asking what is 2*2. Sial uh!!!!!!How can this be sial.....The moment i start reading.....the words start playing around in my head. Should i be understanding it or should i be memorizing it sial? Hmmm....This suck! School sucks! I thought when i get school life could be alot better.....Fucking Shit....!!!! I need to start work soon, I'm suppose to start work today but how can i start work if i myself ain't yet stable?

Anyways, my friend offered me a job and i guess i will change my job. It's back to night life for me.....i earn more so why not right, and I'll be working on weekends so it wouldn't be that difficult and it wouldn't clash with school that much. If I'm free tomorrow then i can go to the work place tomorrow and start the work straight away. All i need to do is stablise myself and everything will be cool. IN TERMS OF MONEY AND LIFE. Hmmmm.........

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Help me! Help Me! I feel lost, i am lost. Alaaaaa....I just started skool and i think it sucks big time uh. I'm 1 month late behind studies and i don't know a single shit about anything. I finish skool at 5pm everyday and i have long hours of break on certain day. Shit! This is Shit, Super Shit. I donno what to do. Its like i rather not go to skool then going to skool. I donno a single thing and the teachers........doing nothing bout it so far.

I have work after skool all the way till 1, and most of my skool days start at 8am. How can i livbe like this for a year? and another year? Fuck, Shit! I feel like running away from everything! I'm surrounded by chinese students everywhere and guess what? There's only 2 malay guys in class including me. Malay girls? 4 of them....The rest????? CHINESE PEOPLE........

Can i just quit school? Now as in now? And just go to Army? Ah!!!!!!!!!I'm living in my own nightmare sial....Someone, just cheer me up, I'm getting older and crankier as days past by, just leave me people......sheesh!