What's Inside Of Me........I Let It Out

What's Inside Of Me........I Let It Out guess thats why I have a diary and a blog. Hmm.....questions, troubles, problems all running through my head....but what are they.......

A year is almost done and what have I achieved this year? Gosh, 1st of all a year is almost ending? And I didn't feel it. Its damn fast uh! I don't wanna waste anymore time cos this time thingy is very important to me. So what if NS doesn't call me next year? I'm not gonna waste anymore time but what if i get into school and they call me half way. I'm in need of big help. This really bothers me a lot. Hmm.....

My dudu, my lover......I love her a lot. I love her so much......i don't know how to describe it. But there are certain things.....certain things that make me think or that makes me sad. Its the small small things that are there...hmm i don't know...Sometimes I get confused...sometimes i just have to put on my thinking cap and think so hard...then when i snap myself out i don't know what I'm thinking about. Its being in a relationship.......caring and loving someone......thats why I love her....the effort and all those that you have you put for her, for that someone.....you put them before you.

So what are my future plans? Hmm...no wonder I think alot.....
After the new year.....try to enlists myself to National service......if they say not yet then I HAVE to start to save so i get myself in school by may. But where am I gonna get the money from? I have to save at least 3000 bux by may.....Its possible but its hard. And i have to work my ass off again...really really hard. And after i pay for enrollment i still have to pay for every sem which is at least 1000 plus. hmm.....stresssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP PLEASE!!!!! Where am i gonna get that much money from. That means I have to work while I study. Its possible but HOW, ITS TIERING, STRESSFUL!!!!! But I have to do it. Its my responsibility. Its my future. I'm a man....I have too.

The school is Tourism Management Institute of Singapore. Its a good school and i have a direct link form My ITE cert that i have and that's one of my only chances and way that i can continue my studies. I don't wanna waste anymore time. I CAN'T!

Well...sayang i hope you can guide me through this life. Cos i think I'll be needing it. Just be there for me, that's all.....

I love you!
Goodnight and Go.

When the sands go through the glass tubes....

Hey Everyone.
Whether those who know me or not.

Just Hi....
2 months have passed and obviously I've gone through quite a number of things in life. The ups and downs....but yea....life goes on no matter how much you hate it.

1. Haven't been making enough money for myself
2. I got banned from doing camps for Innotrek (but life goes on so does camp)
3. My basic amount of money isn't there anymore
4. Have been going around looking for jobs
5. Waiting for Adidas to call to start work
6. Sarah is starting her holidays soon, Yey! (but working at mango, but still yey!)
   
7. Fucking NS hasn't called me yet
8. Still thinking a lot about my life
9. Maybe I'm going Brunei next month
10. Its my deary's birthday and so is mine
11. I love my Sarah a lot aka my girlfriend

Wow! That is quite a number of stuff that has been going on and is gonna happen or is still happening.
Still thinking a lot about my life = Yes I am.....reasonably not that i have nothing better to do or that i want to make my life even more difficult but just to always remind me where i actually am and what i have to actually do to make myself better. And the 1st important big step is by going Ns 1st but they haven't called me yet and its fucking hell bothering me. Which is bullshit....Singapore is full of shit. Wasting people's life for nothing and their fucking reason to make people believe that its so good is, to fucking protect their country which i don't think they know that if all the other countries were to attack Singapore at the same time Singapore would be destroyed, cos of its tiny stupid size. So cos of this I can't continue with my life or continue studying cos that seriously is making me worried. There's so many things I want to get over and done with but some things are just not that easy to settle as fast as other things.

Well.....how's Sarah?

Ah....she's great. My Super girl is being very strong indeed even though she's struggling with the awesome heavy load of projects and homework that she's getting,she's still alive, breathing, and still kicking it! And not forgetting at the same time loving me......heh heh heh..... =)

Yes, and her semester is ending and its another holiday....and yes another Mango session.
I do understand that you need to work there cos you need the money. I do, I seriously do...I just hope you can start abit later so I can celebrate your birthday and another thing, please do have a break when you start working cos you never do...Hai.....da la enough of Mango talk. Just reminding you not to forget to at least take a day or 2 to rest or to cover back. I love you.....cos its always this period of time when you're rushing with school work, deadlines at your fingertips and being so stress with everything and adding to your mind is dodo, and its always this time that dodo misses you the most. Just so you know.

I always wish for the best for you Sarah....with all heart and hope.

And there you go......

Like Sands Through The Hour Glass, So Are The Days Of My Life.

Love you Sarah.