I Just Feel Like It

I just feel the need to do this. Its been a year plus since i last updated my blog. Things aren't as smooth as it should be going and I'm really having a hard time enduring with my NS. Being a fireman isn't an easy job for sure, not just the job, the tough training i go through every duty of my NS life. That few hours of hell is really a tough call. Nothing even words can describe how tough or how bad the training is other then you yourself being part of it. Hmm....that was what i wanted, i wanted to be fireman and now i am one.

The only good thing now is I'm left with about a year to me finishing my NS, in July I'm starting school, gonna start my diploma in tourism and i really hope that goes very well, cos my dear Sarah has finished her degree. I'm really amazed! Its like i met her when she was in year 1 and now she's graduated from school and here i am still the same. We've grown up for sure and we're still doing well. Just gotta move on and start doing new things.

i need to focus. Focus well to go through all this. I just wished things could be a Lil more simpler. That could really help me right now especially at work. And me trying to cope with school soon. Cos I'm like lost. Not knowing what to expect that's coming my way.

Help! my minds almost in a mess. I'm just listening to some Itunes radio channel, not bad! And o ya typing this out randomly. Which ever things that's coming to my head are being typed out here. I need a break real soon but i cant go. Things need to be settled. Money issues every where, things i need things i want. Living on my NS allowance isn't easy. Seems like a lot but neh, its not. I know i know compare my allowance to other vocations or other units, I'm getting one of highest, but that's beside the point. I deserve that money for work and yes, we really do use that money for a whole lot of food and drinks just for a 10 day work schedule. And plus my own responsibilities.....I feel like I'm already working permanently. But I'm still a boy. In me i am a boy. Hmm.....Can i not grow up., [please.!!! help!

Untill then I'll be trying my best to survive and go through all this.

Chiowz......

Things Are Well And Kicking

Unlike Sand.......water is nice, precious and can be the way of life. The way it even exists is a question and special to me.

Sand does the same thing to me, it makes me ponder how it was made but again, sand is just sand and i guess it never goes to waste whereas water is precious, if its not taken care of, preserved it'll be gone for good.

Like sands through the hour glass my days go on and on and its not ready to stop yet . And the things happening in my life are nice and precious to me. Its been a splendid time for me. Ive been doing a few camps few weeks back, and it was great, but tiering though, but as more camps as i do, i start to love my job more and more, except for the few days being out, cos my days are actually going through faster. No wonder i don't feel my days pass by me, cos they just fly by.

Oooo, whats that smelly disgusting smell....Aww damn, it smells.

K its gone.....must be the rubbish downstairs.

Hmm......I bought some things online.....but most of them arn't here with me yet. Damn! And my headphones are freaking spoil, the bad thing is i don;t have the receipt with me so I'm not sure whether i can send it for repair. Hmm....so might as well buy a new one. Hai....one thing after another.....

Well, there's this course that i wanna go to, its IRATA. Which mean Industrial Rope Access Trade Association. Its about climbing and maintanence and I'm freaking Interested not just about the money, Yes money is freaking good but to me its more then that. I find the job fun and challenging and i think it'll be a good skeleton to my life. but the course is abit expensive and I'm not sure whether I'Il can save enough money cos the time is short. The only available time for the course being held is this coming may and i have to produce 1800 by then. O no, o no.....

How o how, finance finance........

Holidays, IRATA......

I love you Sarah

To a busy work month AHEAD! Cheers!!

WOah!!!!How come every time i post it seems like its at the end of the month going to a new month. Is it me or its just passing by very very fast?hmm.....next week's the start to a very very busy month. Camp after camp after camps. And its exciting cos im going to different different places to do camps, expeditions and just a day programs and i hope i use the money wisely.

Well, just to let you guys know im gg to thailand again and this time its going to be more exciting. Yes! it always gets more and more exciting. Im gg for 10 days again but this time im gg to go through msia to hatyai then go all the way up to bangkok!!! then fly back to spore! so ya im gonna start saving to atleast have a thousand bux.

hAPPY nEW yEAR 2008

There goes 2007.

Wokay....unbelievable. I don't know why......but that was fast.

Well....it was my 1st off for new year and yes it was great! I didn't celebrate it, but it was just nice to chill at Ubin and watch fireworks from there. Spending time with dudu and freinds. Wished Ezad was there. Could have been more happening.

Hmm.......Work starts tomorrow and everything else continues. Gosh its like my bday was last month and November was just a 2 months back and now its January. It just feels different every time a new month comes up. I'm getting older and its just telling me I have to get things done. age is catching up, yes i know I'm only 20 but time passes by so fast and like few years time I'll be 25, 27? Time to get married and I better get things done.

NS? NS? When is my time. I've gotta call them, and at the same time save up my money just in case they don't call me anytime soon so I can start studying again. The feeling sucks uh, I feel trapped. And There's nothing much I can do. So just save money.

So far work and money are alright, It's still coming to me. As in I got a few more job offers. I'll be working at Ubin on most weekends now, hopefully that is if business is going well there. Safra is still having programs so ya, money is still coming in and yeap, I've got Adidas to help me with. And to start school I've got to save at least 3000 bux by may. Do you think I can make it?. Hmm.....Hopefully!

You know sometimes you just hope life can go as smoothly as you plan it to be, but there are life's ups and downs and I hope I'm strong enough to go through it with them.

Sheesh, works at 12, I better get my sleep soon.

Goodnight and Go

Happy birthday Darling

Well......Even with the mango madness going on everything is well and still kickin. Its been 3 weeks and I'm still alive! I survived! Haha! never thought I could go through the mango madness sale cause that's the only time you can see the ugly side of freaking ignorant women!
They really don't care and all they know is to buy as many things and their most important objective is be kiasu and mess up the entire place. Seriously. I was shocked. Its not the 1st time working there but seeing pretty stylish women behaving like that makes me disgusted! EYAK!!!!! And to tell you the truth 70% of women are like that and they start as young as 10 years old. Surprised? Don't be! So men out there, next time you go shopping with your girlfriend, wife or soon to be girlfriend or wife, please keep an eye on this disgusting behavior and correct them if you can cos i actually realised that the men who followed their women to shop at mango were the one's helping them fold back the clothes that their women has tried on or has taken a look at. I'm speechless......

My dudu's bday just passed and we just celebrated it. It was on a Friday. And everything went well. You wanna know what i did?
Ahem! I did a candle light dinner and a surprised present in my room surrounded with candles and petals..... WEEE!!!!!! It was great, awesome not that i wanna praise myself but everything went oh so well!

She indeed came early to surprise me at home, but i just had to think fast cos everything wasn't ready, so i blind folded her and locked her in a room where she had to freshen up and change to nice clothes. She was clueless i tell ya! She even scolded me again and again cos she wanted to know what was going on. Sorry Sarah, I don;t lie. You can trust me.

So while she was freshening up, I was rushing to get the things ready, Lighted up the candles, pluck the petals from the flowers and just threw them around my room.
This is what i cooked on that night. A potato salad, wasn't that great but was ok. A cream seafood pasta which was awesome! And lastly a nice warm sexy fondue with ice cold frozen fruits and marshmallows. One of the best highlights for the night.

But it wasn't over, She was just speechless, surprised and couldn't believe i did all that. But that wasn't all, after the meals, i brought her to my room and yea, her eyes were closed and when it was the right time to open she just jumped for joy and she hugged and thank me. Yeap, she did tear and by that i just knew that she was happy. I did it! There the letter which was in a frame and her present laid on the bed.

Hai....finally its over. I planned that so long and finally it went so well and its over. What a relief!

Its my bday soon and New year too. Hmm what should i do? Not celebrating it. Don;t think Sarah's doing anything for me cos she told me already. :( Its ok Sarah, its just a birth day. I don't need gifts to make me smile and be happy, just you, to love me, and just to let you know, I love surprises!

I love you!

What's Inside Of Me........I Let It Out

What's Inside Of Me........I Let It Out guess thats why I have a diary and a blog. Hmm.....questions, troubles, problems all running through my head....but what are they.......

A year is almost done and what have I achieved this year? Gosh, 1st of all a year is almost ending? And I didn't feel it. Its damn fast uh! I don't wanna waste anymore time cos this time thingy is very important to me. So what if NS doesn't call me next year? I'm not gonna waste anymore time but what if i get into school and they call me half way. I'm in need of big help. This really bothers me a lot. Hmm.....

My dudu, my lover......I love her a lot. I love her so much......i don't know how to describe it. But there are certain things.....certain things that make me think or that makes me sad. Its the small small things that are there...hmm i don't know...Sometimes I get confused...sometimes i just have to put on my thinking cap and think so hard...then when i snap myself out i don't know what I'm thinking about. Its being in a relationship.......caring and loving someone......thats why I love her....the effort and all those that you have you put for her, for that someone.....you put them before you.

So what are my future plans? Hmm...no wonder I think alot.....
After the new year.....try to enlists myself to National service......if they say not yet then I HAVE to start to save so i get myself in school by may. But where am I gonna get the money from? I have to save at least 3000 bux by may.....Its possible but its hard. And i have to work my ass off again...really really hard. And after i pay for enrollment i still have to pay for every sem which is at least 1000 plus. hmm.....stresssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP PLEASE!!!!! Where am i gonna get that much money from. That means I have to work while I study. Its possible but HOW, ITS TIERING, STRESSFUL!!!!! But I have to do it. Its my responsibility. Its my future. I'm a man....I have too.

The school is Tourism Management Institute of Singapore. Its a good school and i have a direct link form My ITE cert that i have and that's one of my only chances and way that i can continue my studies. I don't wanna waste anymore time. I CAN'T!

Well...sayang i hope you can guide me through this life. Cos i think I'll be needing it. Just be there for me, that's all.....

I love you!
Goodnight and Go.

When the sands go through the glass tubes....

Hey Everyone.
Whether those who know me or not.

Just Hi....
2 months have passed and obviously I've gone through quite a number of things in life. The ups and downs....but yea....life goes on no matter how much you hate it.

1. Haven't been making enough money for myself
2. I got banned from doing camps for Innotrek (but life goes on so does camp)
3. My basic amount of money isn't there anymore
4. Have been going around looking for jobs
5. Waiting for Adidas to call to start work
6. Sarah is starting her holidays soon, Yey! (but working at mango, but still yey!)
   
7. Fucking NS hasn't called me yet
8. Still thinking a lot about my life
9. Maybe I'm going Brunei next month
10. Its my deary's birthday and so is mine
11. I love my Sarah a lot aka my girlfriend

Wow! That is quite a number of stuff that has been going on and is gonna happen or is still happening.
Still thinking a lot about my life = Yes I am.....reasonably not that i have nothing better to do or that i want to make my life even more difficult but just to always remind me where i actually am and what i have to actually do to make myself better. And the 1st important big step is by going Ns 1st but they haven't called me yet and its fucking hell bothering me. Which is bullshit....Singapore is full of shit. Wasting people's life for nothing and their fucking reason to make people believe that its so good is, to fucking protect their country which i don't think they know that if all the other countries were to attack Singapore at the same time Singapore would be destroyed, cos of its tiny stupid size. So cos of this I can't continue with my life or continue studying cos that seriously is making me worried. There's so many things I want to get over and done with but some things are just not that easy to settle as fast as other things.

Well.....how's Sarah?

Ah....she's great. My Super girl is being very strong indeed even though she's struggling with the awesome heavy load of projects and homework that she's getting,she's still alive, breathing, and still kicking it! And not forgetting at the same time loving me......heh heh heh..... =)

Yes, and her semester is ending and its another holiday....and yes another Mango session.
I do understand that you need to work there cos you need the money. I do, I seriously do...I just hope you can start abit later so I can celebrate your birthday and another thing, please do have a break when you start working cos you never do...Hai.....da la enough of Mango talk. Just reminding you not to forget to at least take a day or 2 to rest or to cover back. I love you.....cos its always this period of time when you're rushing with school work, deadlines at your fingertips and being so stress with everything and adding to your mind is dodo, and its always this time that dodo misses you the most. Just so you know.

I always wish for the best for you Sarah....with all heart and hope.

And there you go......

Like Sands Through The Hour Glass, So Are The Days Of My Life.

Love you Sarah.